People in front of my house lookin' for a party: On Dec. 11, around 11 p.m.,

Columbus 

Police believe that Jake stabbed Demetrius: On Dec.7, around 3 in the morning, a caller over on Fall Creek Lane reported that a man named Demetrius had been stabbed. Although the cops believe that a dude name Jacob did it, and questioned "D" he said he didn't and he "ain't gonna tell on him." I wonder what that's all about?

It's not DiGiorno, it the police!: Recently there had been a string of pizza delivery driver robberies. On Dec. 10, at about 11:40 p.m., a pizza delivery man flagged a cop car down and told them that he thought that he was being set up to get robbed. Some S.W.A,T. officers switched cars and went to the vacant house on Wrexham Avenue, where the pizza was to be delivered and out popped two dudes with a knife and a can of mace. The police shot one of them and the other surrendered with no problem. Bain! Delivered these fools to jail in 3 0 minutes or less!

Old gangsta robbed the United Dairy Store on W. Broad Street: On Nov.29, around 12:04 a.m., an old dude about 60 years-old went into the UDF sore on West Broad Street and told the clerk "I got ah gun." The clerk didn't ask any questions and gave OG the loot. Police are looking for this old fool to help him have a Merry Xfnas.

Johnny Walker in an altercation over on East Main: On Dec. 10, around 3:47 p.m., a caller on East Main Street reported that John Walker was in a fight with some dude and got stabbed. Johnny was taken to a near by hospital with non‑life threatening wounds. The police are still looking for whoever is was that stabbed him.

Somebody shot Norbal: On Dec. 11, around 6 a.m., police got a call that a man named Norbal had been shot over on East Livingston Avenue. He was taken to an area hospital in stable condition. There are no suspects.

Byron got stabbed by somebody on the north side: On Dec. 11, at 11: 10 p.m., a caller in the 200 block of North 20th Street, called and reported that 25 year‑old Byron Jones had been stabbed. Jones was taken to an area hospital where his wounds are said to be non‑life threatening.

The pepperoni pizza police shooting on Wrexham is under investigation: On Dec. 12, the police chief released a statement that the two cops that were involved in shooting of the one pizza stick up dude is under investigation, and at this time the two officers have been reassigned. This is a normal procedure when an officer discharges their weapon in an incident.

University Heights 

Lashai and Lamier busted for driving with no license: On Nov.30, around 10:39 p.m., the police stopped a big ol' brown Chrysler Cirrus on Warrensville Road, with a man and a woman in it. The two were later identified as Lashai and a dude named Lamiere, who was driving under suspension. Lashai had an outstanding warrant for her arrest with UHPD. They both were hauled in and booked.

Ndeyenina is getting threatening calls and texts: On Nov.23, a lady named Ndeyenima, went to the UHPD and reported that some idiot keeps calling, texting and harassing her with threatening messages. Police are looking into the matter for the cyber bully who keeps bothering this woman.

Three more young girls busted at TJ Maxx: We need to let our kids know if they get caught stealing they are tagged for life as a thief and many companies won't hire you even it did happened when you were a juvenile. On Nov.26, around 4:15 p.m., security at TJ Maxx caught three young girls shoplifting. Two were 14, and on was 12. I hope they learned a lesson.

57 year‑old, short woman and a thin lady caught shoplifting at Macy's: What in the world were they thinking? On Nov. 21, around 5:02 p.m., security guards at Macy's called and reported that they were holding two women that they caught stealing. One woman is 57, and the other 3 8. Busted! I don't know what was on their mind, because this is the time of year that all stores are on the lookout for thieves and shoplifters. They both are too old for that and they should know better.

Somebody stole her pocketbook on Black Friday: On Nov.25, around 11:30 a.m., a very pissed‑off woman who was shopping at TJ Maxx went into the UHPD, and reported that some clepto had lifted her purse from her buggy while she was shopping. The police went over there to see if they could locate this thief, but they were GOA/ UTL.

Two young boys busted at Macy's for theft and lying to the police: On Nov.23, around 4: 10 p.m., security at Macy's called the UHPD and reported that they were holding two boys in their custody for theft. The 15 and 17 year old boys were taken to the UHPD station and turned over to their parents. They both were also charged with obstructing the police and falsification.

Beachwood

A black car has been sitting in front of my house for almost an hour: On Dec.3, at about 4:33 p.m., a suspicious resident in the 25000 block of Cardington Drive, called and reported that some people in a black Toyota been sitting in front of her house for almost an hour. "Ya'll come see what they are up too."

Man keeps getting threats on his voice mail by a computer: On Dec.3, at about 10: 13 a.m., a very disturbed 39 year‑old man in the 3200 block of Havel Drive, reported that he's getting threats by a computer on his voice mail. Police checked it out and found that these are random computer generated voices with no known suspects. Now, maybe this dude can relax now.

"Ain't no fire, but the smoke detector keeps telling me to call 911 ": On Dec. 3, around 3 in the morning, a very disturbed resident in the 26000 block of Village Lane, called police and told them that, although they don't see or smell smoke, the carbon monoxide/ smoke alarm keeps telling them to call 911. The fire department showed up and found that the detector was defective. All appears to be ok.

Hotel employees reports too many people in the room: On Dec. 11, around 11: 52 p.m., concerned employees at the Homewood Suites reported that some people in one of their rooms had way too many folks in their suite, which was overcrowded and "they are  makin' way too much noise" and we want some of them removed. About six big ol' police showed up and cleaned house, dispersing the loud bunch.

People in front of my house lookin' for a party: On Dec. 11, around 11 p.m., an angry resident in the 25000 block of Maidstone Lane, called and reported that several folks are sitting in a car with the lights on in front of his house and they are looking for a party. No party here! Police showed up and made the folks move on. Good riddance!

They keep cyber bulling my kid: On Dec. 10, at about 1 p.m., very angry parents of a kid in the 2500 block of Buckhurst Drive, called and reported that their kid's former friend was on the computer bulling their child and they wanted it to stop. The cops arrived and told the bullied and bullier, "Yall stay away from each other, yah hear," which settled the problem.

Employee sets off back door alarm trying to sneak off the job: On Dec. 10 at about 10:22 p.m., an alarm company reported that someone had set off the alarm trying to exit the building. Two cars showed up and the busted employee tried to tell the police that they set it off by accident.