On April 18, around 10:54 p.m., a dude named John called from a house on West 47th  

*Criminal of the week

O’ geezer just robbed CVS and threatened to kill the clerk: On April 18, at about 2 p.m., the Franklin County Sheriff, in Columbus, reported that some old fool about 70 years-old, with white hair, a white beard and a white moustache and no “teef,” went into the CVS Drug Store on West Broad Street, flashed a pistol and told the clerk to give up the cash or die. The clerk complied with the grouchy old geezer by placing the money in a plastic bag and handed it over to him. The clerk said pops hobbled out of the store and was last seen swaggering south towards Murry Hill Road – Now Granpaw knows he need to quit.

Akron

What the hell you doing back here hiding on our loading dock: On April 19, at 10:37 a.m.,  an employee at an industrial warehouse in the 1200 block of Massillon Road, called and reported that they had just caught and confronted some thug who was hiding in back of their loading dock. A car was sent over to find out why in the hell was he back there hiding – Ya’ll know that rascal ain’t up to no good if you caught him hiding back there!

What! Somebody found a wallet at the Metro Station and turned it in?: On April 19, at 10:35 a.m., the dispatcher requested that a car head over to the Metro Station and pick up a wallet that somebody had found and turned in. A car was sent over to the station to pick up the lost billfold and return it to headquarters. This just proves that there are some God fearing folk still around here.

 They spotted some scallywag prowling around the third floor: Around 10:51 a.m., on April 19, some frantic employees at a work place in a building onSouth Main Street, called and reported that they had just spotted a suspicious looking dude with a pony tail in the building walking around on the third floor. A car was sent over to check out this shady looking character. The cops said they think it might be a dude nameRoy and they have been looking for him for some other stuff he may have done.

A woman over on Walsh Avenue keep calling 911 and hanging up:

On April 19, at about 10:56 a.m., an dutiful dispatcher requested that a car go over to a house in the 800 block ofWalsh Avenueand check out what the heck is going on with a woman who can be heard screaming and saying that some folks is taking and stealing stuff out of her yard. She keeps calling 911 and hanging up. Whatever the situation is ol’ girl needs to make up her mind whether she wants the police or she doesn’t.

It ain’t the smoke alarm – They’re robbing the Bar-B-Q joint!:

At around 10:28 p.m., on April 20, several cars were dispatched in response to a hold-up alarm that was received from the Bar-B-Que Boss restaurant over in the1800 block ofCopley Road. The dispatcher requested that any or the closest car in that area respond. Several cars rushed over to the rib joint to try and catch the bandit, Smokey the Pig.

A big ol’ family squabble over on Burkhardt Avenue: On April 20, at 10:33 p.m., a dispatcher requested that any car respond to a big hullabaloo with some folks in the 1000 block of Burkhardt Avnue, who are raising hell in a domestic dispute.    A car was rushed out to that location to try and settle things before these fools tear the house down.

Columbus

Dang! They done robbed po Subway again!: On April 11, at 8:45 p.m., a crook walked into the Subway Restaurant onTussing Road, approached the counter, showed the clerk his pistol that was in his waist and told the clerk to empty the register. The employee did as told, and handed over the cash.  The thug then ordered the worker to lie on the floor and then he fled on foot. Crime stoppers are offering a reward for this punk and if you saw or know something, say something. Call (614) 645 TIPS (8477) and get paid.

Man screams at himself and punches police in his face: Around 9:33 p.m., on April 14, a police officer responded to a house in the 2300 block ofMalka Court, and found a man outside screaming at other people and him self. While the officer was evaluating the situation the guy turned around and punched the officer square in the face.  The cop tasered his butt and then took him into custody. The officer was taken to a near by hospital and treated. Mr. Mad Man was hauled off to jail.

Four folks wounded in house party shooting on Ohio Ave.: On April 15, at 12:30 a.m., a person in the 200 block of Ohio avenue, called and reported that they were having a nice lil’ party when an argument broke out and some thugs  went outside and started shooting in front of the house and hit four people. A boy 17, one 18, and two 16 year-olds were all taken to a near by hospital and treated. All were listed in stable condition. These punks done gone plum crazy shooting folks.

Ol’ grey head dope fien with a goatee sticks up Target Pharmacy: On April 15, at about 9:24 a.m., an old, grey-head dude with a goatee went into the Target store onGraceland Boulevard; walked up to the pharmacy counter and handed the employee a note that demanded several described pain pills. The clerk loaded the junkie up the medication and Mr. Get High took off running out of the store.  A surveillance camera caught it all on tape. What in the world is going on with these old fools still sticking folks up?

Robber told clerk “You betta sit on the floor til I leaves”: Around 10:47 p.m., on April 19, some weird acting fool went into the BP Duke & Duchess gas station on West Broad Street, walked up to the counter and told the clerk to give him all the money and the cigarettes. The weird robber then told the worker they betta sit on the floor until he was gone. Ain’t these fools are getting crazier and crazier!

Another ol’ rascal robbed Family Dollar: On April 19, at around 2:49 p.m., an old, tall azz , skinny geezer, went into the Family Dollar store located onEast Main Street and told the clerk that he had a pistol and this is a stick up. The clerk described the old dude to look to be in his late 40s and looked like he wasn’t for no jokes. The employee gave this old fool the money so he could get the hell out of there. A camera caught it all on tape. What in the hell is going on with all these old azz men out here robbin’ folks?

They just stuck up another BP station for cigarettes: On Tuesday, April 10, at 12:14 a.m., a crook went into the BP gas station onWest Waterloo Street in Canal Winchester, and ordered the clerk to empty the cash register. The dude told the clerk that he had a gun, but he never showed it. The clerk handed this idiot a bag with some cash and cigarettes and Mr. Ding Bat took off running through the parking lot and trotted eastbound. Oooowe! Another close call.

Cleveland

Great big woman is lying in the middle of the street screaming: On April 18, at 10:38 p.m., there were several calls from residents and motorist in the 7200 block ofIndiana Avenue, who reported that there was big ol’ heavy-set woman laying in the middle of the street just screaming. They said the woman is refusing to  get up and won’t move out the way.  A car was sent out to see if they could assist and help move this big sister out of the street.

A dude named Phillip wants the police to help get his stuff back: On April 18, at around 10:21 p.m., a dude named Phillip W. called police and asked if they could go with him to a house in the 10100 block ofBarrett Avenue, and help him get his stuff out. Phil said he didn’t want to go in by himself cause he knew there was be some trouble and that ain’t what he wanted. A car was sent out to help this peace loving dude get his stuff back.

Some thug just robbed a man at gun point on East 118^th: On April 18, around 10:36 p.m., a man called and reported that some thug had just robbed at gun point on East 118th. The victim said the gunman had what looked like a 38 and he wasn’t gone take no chances on this fool pulling the trigger, so he gave him all that he had. The victim said he would meet the police at the HP Gas Station on 140th. and Kinsman.  A car was sent out to help.

Three bullies whipping on a lil’ lady on Quincy: On April 18, about 10:45 p.m., some concerned folks onQuincy Avenue, saw three punks beating up a woman and called the cops. Regardless to what the fight was about, it don’t take three roughnecks to beat up one lil woman. These three fools are all cowards and bullies. Also, it is a problem, when some of today’s folks see a person who needs help and they keep rolling because they don’t want to get involved. But, if you see something say something, it could be yo momma.  

Woman sees her F150 on Abell that thugs carjacked earlier: Around 10:48 p.m., on April 18, a very pissed-off woman called and reported that she saw the silver Ford F150 that some clowns had taken the keys at gun point, carjacking them  earlier that day.  Ya’ll come get these fools and get my truck back. A car was rushed out to round up this car thief before they could leave.  

Some clown on East 55^th is threatening Stacy and her son with a knife: Around 10:56 p.m., on April 18, a very frightened woman named Stacy in the 2500 block of East 55^th (in the projects), called 911 and then hung up. During the brief conversation, she reported that a 21 year-old clown was there threatening her and her son with a knife. When the dispatcher tried calling back Stacy would not answer. A car was rushed out to see what was this all about. I bet Mr. Bad Azz put that damn knife down when the cops got there.

John say, a big, crazy looking pit-bull is running lose on West 47^th:

On April 18, around 10:54 p.m., a dude named John called from a house on West 47th   Street, and reported that there was a big, ol’ crazy looking brindle pit-bull running lose on their street, and they are worried this dog is going to bite somebody. A unit was sent out to help spot and capture this big ol’ monster. Ya’ll need to try and keep big ol’ dogs like this locked up!