Folk’s are just sick and damn tiered of theses clowns pulling up in front of their house blasting loud music like they are crazy and looking at you like they dare you to say something

Criminal of the week:

Columbus, OHIO

Thugs newest stick up game is “Gimme all duh cigarettes:” Ha’ mercy! These hoodlums are getting mo’ and mo’ trifling; they have gone and started robbing stores just for cigarettes. On Aug. 4, at 4:08 a.m., a thug walked into theSpeedway convenient store onSouth Galloway Road, and told the clerk to “gimme all duh cigarettes.” The clerk knew this fool must be high on something and complied with this idiot, and not only gave this chump the cigarettes, but also gave him a little change to make sure that he didn’t come back. The robbery is still under investigation and if you know something say something and call (614) 645-8477.

Akron Ohio

Burglar breaks in and ransacks house just for the hell of it: On July 20, around 2 a.m., a burglar kicked down the side door of a house in the 600 block of Fernwood Drive, however, since their was northing worth his while to steal, this bastard just started tearing up stuff and ransacked the house for the hell of it. When crimes like this are committed it makes you want to just kick off in his behind just to get even.  The burglary is being investigated.

Crack heads are back to breaking in and stealing copper pipes: Well, let’s just say that they had never stopped, but they realized they have gutted most of the vacant houses, and now they are like dogs on the prowl looking for a bone. On Aug. 2, it was reported that the bathroom window had been broken out in a vacant house in the 600 block ofUpson Street, and the rogues had gone in and stolen all the copper wire and the cooper plumbing. Watch out! These scavengers are also breaking into occupied homes as well.

The police busted Antonio for carrying a loaded pistol in his car:

Some nitwit’s just don’t have a clue that carrying a loaded gun is a crime, and unless you have a permit you can’t be packing. On Aug. 2, at around 7 a.m., it was reported that Antonio Daniels was busted for driving around with a loaded gun in his car. They have placed some serious charges on him, Carrying a Concealed Weapon and Improper Handling of a Firearm in a Motor Vehicle.

Ooowee! Thugs stole all 4 of his pistols, a rifle and his shotgun: They didn’t leave this po’ dude anything to defend his self with, but they should thank the man above that he wasn’t home when they broke in, cause it would have been, boom-boom-boom! On July 2, around 7 a.m., it was reported that some thugs broke into a house in the 1400 block of Gurley Avenue, and stole every gun that they could find.  Missing are four pistols, a rifle, a shotgun, blank checks, miscellaneous financial account numbers, credit cards, personal papers and some other stuff. Bet-chu he has a piece hidden!

Jimmy Mac is in trouble. He just can’t leave that woman alone: On Aug. 2 at 10 a.m., it was reported that 47-year-old James C McCullen III, was charged with Violation of a Civil Protection Order. Jimmy should know better because he has a prior conviction for violation, and a protection order which he disobeyed back on 5-31-12. He’s been told before to leave people alone when they don’t want to be bothered. Ya’ll try to talk to him before the judges do.

Some thief kicked in the front door and stole his puppy: On Aug. 2, around 7:06 a.m., it was reported by a very upset owner of a 5-month-old puppy who lives in the 500 block ofTalbot Avenue that some dog gone thief kicked in his front door between 6:15 a.m. and 4:12 p.m., and stole his damn puppy. Folk’s just can’t have nothing without some fool breaking in. That same puppy might grow up and bite the hand that stole him.

A rotten “A” rouge stole all of his commercial car cleaning stuff: On Aug. 2, around 7:10 a.m., a man who was mad as hell and lives in the 600 block of Johnson St., called in and reported that some rotten rogue had broke in his front window and stole damn near everything that he uses to earn a living. They stole his platinum polish, two 5 gallon containers of chemicals for car detailing, four sets of speakers, six amplifiers, TV, speakers, an electric welder, a camera, and a portable Kirby vacuum.  He believes that the theft occurred from 7/30-7/31 between 5 p.m. and 6:50 a.m. If you know something, say something so this po’ man can keep earning an honest living.

A scallywag threw a rock and broke out the damn window at U-Haul: On Aug. 2, at 7:10 a.m., it was reported that some low life scallywag threw a big rock and broke the large glass door window at the U-Haul store located over onVernon Odom Boulevard.  The manager said he can’t imagine who and why some low-down dog would do such a thing. Nothing was taken or anything harmed other than the bastards broke out the window.

Columbus Ohio

Two dumb clucks busted minutes after they robbed Tobacco Outlet: On July 31, at about 10:27 a.m., a couple of shabby-looking old crooks named Anthony Atkinson, 42, and James Comer, 46-years-old,  walked into the Tobacco Outlet located on West Broad Street and stuck it up at gun point. The two took off and Sheriff Zach Scott was on their behinds like stank of you know what. Within a very short time, Zach’s men had tracked the two critters right to their house. There they found the two dummies sitting in their car still holding the loaded gun and the cash that had been taken from the business. Good work guys! 

Scoundrel’s rip-off a pickup truck and its 26 foot-long open trailer: These had to be professional thieves to make this kind of heist and get away with something this big. Back on July 16, a big “A” green Ford F-250 diesel truck was ripped-off right under their noses at the Pitstick Farm right outside Columbus.  Attached to the truck was a 26 foot long custom built Shoaf trailer with three 72 inch deck zero Kubota lawn cutting equipment/ mower.  How in the hell did they get a way with something like that?

Cleveland Ohio

Drunken old fart is over at Metro Hospital acting a fool: On Aug. 2, around 11:14 p.m., a call was received from security officer named Hernandez in the emergency room at Metro Hospital on West 25^th Street, screaming that they needed help with some old fart that had been brought in drunk as a skunk and he is acting a plum fool.   Would ya’ll please hurry and get here and help us to get this clown under control. Several cars were rushed to the scene.

Drunken woman at Calgory School playground is kicking a dude’s butt: Around 11:15 pm., on Aug.2, several calls were received from people on West 23^rd Street, at the Calgory Playground, asking to send somebody to stop a woman in the park who was kicking a dude’s behind like she’s Mike Tyson. Several callers said that the couple is highly intoxicated and has been sleeping in the woods for the last few days. A car was sent out to help rescue ol’ boy before he got knocked the hell out. They say when the moon is full folk’s go crazy – is this proof?

Miss Jacobs say they’re drunk, gambling, cussin and blocking the sidewalk: On Aug. 2, at 11:17 p.m., Miss Jacobs who lives in the 1000 block of East 76^th Street, called and said that she is sick and tiered of the bull crap of some thugs who are always out in front of her house, blocking the damn sidewalk, shooting craps, cussin like sailors, and drunk as Cootie Brown. Ya’ll betta get here quick before she bust a cap in they’re behinds. A car was sent out to send these pro gamblers downtown to the casino so folk’s can get some sleep.

Bounty hunter asking for some help to get this nut on West 44^th: On Aug.2, at 11:19 p.m., a skeptical bail bondsman-bounty hunter called in and asked for some help because he was ready to go to a house on West 44^th Street, to try to recover a big strong dude name Mr.Santiago. Mr. Bondsman said that this rascal can get pretty tough and he’s not sure what might happen. A unit was sent out to try and help.

Ya’ll come make this fool turn that damn loud music down: Folk’s are just sick and damn tiered of theses clowns pulling up in front of their house blasting loud music like they are crazy and looking at you like they dare you to say something. On Aug. 2, around 11:25 p.m., an old lady who lives on East 102^nd Street called, and said that she had had enough of that sh##, and ya’ll come get this ignorant bastard and make him turn that loud-a## music down or turn it off.  A car was sent out to cite this idiot for disturbing the piece.